All the things.

Something I realized:
Whenever I meet new people- online or otherwise
[Come on. We all know it's online.] Shut up. I'm trying to make a point.-
Once they ask "So what do you like to do?" or "What are your hobbies?"
I pretty much know the conversation will either go no where or be forced and awkward.

Who the fuck am I.

Deadpool thing I tried up there. Get it? No? Moving on.

Here is how nights seem to go for the past few days. Nights. Whatever:
It's three in the afternoon. Suddenly, I am awake. 
Or any where before three. I'm not picky. 
Look at phone. Everyone seems to need me before noon. 
I let them all down, not caring like the bad ass mother fucker that I am.
I text like, two, maybe three of these people back.
I'm so fucking popular.
Cough out a lung.
Hate plague.
Die.
Foreplay skype with Dillon.
Watch an episode or two of Walking Dead.
Really just killing time until the sun sets.
That's when the fun starts.
Play a game or two of LoL while making fun of fatty.
Die countless times.
Ensure that we lose.
Really, I give him many more reasons to make fun of me than he does.
Because you're fat.
That's right. You.
You're a fatty.
Good thing I'm into that.
Four hour Skype call.
Feel way too fucking sappy.
Insult Dillon again.
Y' know.
For good measure.
Complain about my hair.
And everything else.
Hang up.
Text. 
Watch more Walking Dead.
Sleep. 
Or not.
More often, not.
At least not until what most people would consider 'Mid-morning.'
Fuck you, most people.

Sleep.
Lately, I've been going to sleep when I feel like it. 
Not saying 'oh damn. It's nine in the morning. Maybe I should sleep.'
Fuck that. 
Once it hurts to keep my eyes open, that's when I sleep.
And I sleep pretty soundly, and not for very long.
It's nice. I can run all day on three solid hours.

Then again, that's three hours for being sick in bed.
Yay.

I'm loving being single right meow.
Although I could listen to that damn voice all night. 
I do miss being allowed to be openly cheesy about everything, though.
Fuck feelings. Whatever happens, eh? In general. About everything.
Kind of weird. For once, I'm not just, diving head first into anything.
Just kind of, letting it be. Let it do it's own thing.
Not thinking too much about anything. 
Not over analyzing every little thing.
Much more... relaxing. 
It's so nice. 

Then again, it could just be lack of emotional need.
I do miss the closeness.
Falling asleep next to someone, waking up to kisses.
Ah man. Kissing. 
Holding hands. 

Like for once I feel like a human. A whole human.
Not needing anyone to fill some kind of vacancy.
Emotionally full?



The fuck am I talking about.